Oh, Ava!

Last night on Kell on Earth, Kelly Cutrone and her sassy cute daughter Ava were chilling together when Kelly's mom called and told the girls she was on her way to Wal-Mart. Naturally since Kelly and Ava are awesome they chastised Grandma for this. After the call, Ava announced, "I can't believe mom is going to Wal-Mart...the enemy of Target."

I love kids.

Why do I care when I don't even watch anymore?

OK, are you ready? You have to be able to concentrate because there are many layers here. Right, so, recently Heidi landed a small role in an upcoming Adam Sandler/Nicole Kidman film. Normally Spencer is her manager but apparently she has fired him and instead hired her psychic, who will now be making all her career decisions. Spencer claimed he had plans of his own anyway: taking a break from filming The Hills to join the fight on cyberterrorism. According to Fox News, he told People mag that "upon learning of President Obama's declaration that the 'cyber threat is one of the most serious economic and national security challenges we face as a nation,' I have decided to refocus my energy and devote my full resources to helping America face this and other unprecedented challenges. My new mission is this: To do my part in maintaining the technological superiority of the U.S. military and prevent emerging technologies from threatening our nation's security." Oooo, not so fast, Fox News! We should have known it was too bad to be true when it was such a well-worded quote. So what's the truth? The truth, folks, is that Spencer is taking a break from The Hills because, ah, he was told to do so. Apparently the aspiring Cyber Terrorism Superhero got so irate at a producer for the show that he informed her he should kill her for asking him to do something he apparently didn't want to do. So, in review: Spencer is lying about fighting terrorism to cover up that he's actually in anger management and his wife is taking career advice from a psychic. Did we get all of that?

Oh yes, one more thing: per the psychic, they are no longer to be called Speidi but by their actual names. Which I believe are DoucheMonster and PlasticLady.

the Globes at the Oscars

Here's an Oscar dress that didn't get enough attention and may I say, "Oh my!" Where did those gals come from? She looks smokin'.

And then there was one

Corey Haim died of what appears to be (sigh) an accidental drug overdose. Of course that's what he died of! Oh Corey. You deserved better then to go out the way we figured you would. He was 38 and best known for the overlooked show The 2 Coreys which included an intervention on Haim by the other Corey, Todd Bridges, and Pauly Shore. It was actually a really weird show, the first season was sitcom-y and the second took a bit of a dark turn. I liked it anyway. And let's face it, I have awesome taste.

Peace out, Corey. The world will not be nearly as cool with only one of you around.

Micro-blogging on the Oscars.

Batgirl and That Girl watching the Oscars together- updating as necessary sans pictures:

- Kathryn Bigelow (Male Gigolo)- total Mother of the Bride (MOB) dress and she needs to invest in Spanx

- Charlize Theron- Charplease that dress is awful

-George Clooney is verging on Trump hair.

- Jennifer Lopez's ass is so big it needs its own tent- BLOG IT! (Brett)

- Heath Ledger isn't going to present this year- thanks for pointing that out, E! Batgirl was pretty sure they were going to do a Futurama thing and just have his head.

- "If fashion were porn, this dress would be the money shot!" Gaby Sidibe (Precious) on her dress

- We are pretty sure that Kathy Ireland is selling tents- she is really highlighting the benefits of the wonderful tent that reaches all the way down the red carpet- fantastic!

- (On the Oscar's salute to horror films) Alison: Twilight is NOT a horror film! Kate: I'm horrified that it's popular! Brett: BLOG IT!

No idea how this will work

Apparently there's going to be a Smurfs movie. And it's got itself a star. None other than...Neil Patrick Harris!

Bleak Hole (get it?)

I was intrigued to read online that Hole is getting back together. Of course as a tortured Catholic high school girl I was all about Hole and Courtney Love. I never got to see them play live, though I was supposed to when they toured with Marilyn Manson. Shockingly the tour broke up by the time it would have come to Minneapolis. Who could have foreseen that! Anyway when I read this news my first thought was what kind of voodoo did she perform on the former members to get them to agree to that. The answer is...none of them are actually in on the reunion! It's JUST HER and some other random dudes she probably picked up on the emo street corner. It's just her and her new solo album which apparently is so rockin' that it needs to carry that Hole label. Eric Erlandson, the only other member besides Love who was in every line-up of the band prior to this, is insisting that she just can't slap Hole's name on it as he owns some of the domain. Love, of course, is insisting that she can. And someting about Melissa auf du Mar being really confused, but nobody cares about her.

Maybe it's just me, but I am of the correct opinioin that it DOES NOT COUNT as a reunion unless it's like 80% of the original band. Seriously, one original member? Even if that original member is so larger then life and f'ed up that one would almost count them as several people, still no. I'm not falling for it! Doesn't count as Hole. The end.