Sunday, May 31, 2009
Lauren! COME BACK! At least get a better exit!
I love going to the movies with my brother Chris for many reasons; a big one is that during the previews, if it looks like the movie being advertised would appear to be stupid, he does this awesome, dramatic, slow motion thumbs...DOWN! Well, that image appeared in my head by the end of tonight's Hills.
Hey! MTV! Remember why this show started? Because of LAUREN. Lauren, who was in her own last episode for like, 5 seconds. We all know you're going to start parading around Kristin like the bitchy drunk blond idiot that she is but did you have to start doing it in so heavily in Lauren's last go-round? Seriously, like the dramatic "Did you give someone their invitation" moment. Or her fabulous entrance and oh, I guess the only open seat is the one next to Justin! (I, personally, thought he should have sat by Stacey The Bartender. They could have had their own "Why the hell were we invited" aisle.)
I did enjoy Holly's mini-meltdown during the rehearsal dinner when she was throwing food and then acted like it wasn't a big deal to be throwing food. Or when she tried to redeem herself by bravely telling Heidi she could "un-maid of honor" her. I also enjoyed Brody's reaction to Spencer's "I'm a changed man" speech which I missed most of as I was enjoying the Brode's chuckle fest. And of course the classic oh, we should wrap up loose ends moment of Lauren talking to Kelly Cutrone. Was she giving the world's longest two weeks? Is this to be our last memory of Kelly? Let down #201 of the episode.
I fully expected to cry at this episode. But alas, I was not given a chance because it was all about Kristin too soon. Oh, and the stupid wedding. So, MTV, who I'm sure is reading this right now and feeling shame and remorse, a big slow motion thumbs down to you for not giving Lauren the chance to fitfully exit her own show. In fact I dare say you should change the name now. And theme music. Though I do thank you for giving us one last classic Lo smart ass remark followed by a classic Lauren facial expression. I think that's the memory of this episode I will carry with me. The rest can suck it.
(And yes, that is Sleazy T up top.)